It's the end of the year already?

Once again, I've failed to update my blog on a daily basis. And as usual, I've been busy with work, husband and family.

Small sister has recently been awarded for suspected dengue. Pitty her, she's already so skinny to start with, she's even skinnier now. She was awarded last Tuesday, on the basis that her blood platelet count was 38. It went up to 70 yesterday and hopefully it goes up again today so that she can be discharge by tomorrow.

Work wise, alhamdullillah, not too busy but not too idle oso.

Business wise, planning to open our second car wash outlet sometime in Jan '09. Insyaallah.

As usual, at the end of the year, I will close my "personal account" ie doing stock check on what I have achieved during the year, what I have not achieved during the year, is there anything I want to change etc. So far, apart from the incident with Hootie, I'm quite content with what I have so far. I've changed in a lot of ways and I'm happy that everything turn out for the better. Allah the Almighty sure has strange ways in making things happen.

I've got a wardrobe full of new clothes to complement my new look. I have a whole new, better attitude towards life and I'm more relax now. For this, I would like to thank my family, in-laws and great friends (macam bagi credit kat academy award je... :)...).

Sometimes, one drastic event is all one need to wake up and smell the coffee. Yes, there are moments where I break down and cry but I'm proud to say that I came out of it a stronger person.

So for those who thinks that it's the end of the world for you, don't. Every cloud has a silver lining and moving your cheese is not something bad. Always look for the hidden blessings and you'll be find. If not, can always come and talk to me.

Just in case this is my last entry for the year, thanks again guys for helping me out in my time of needs and have a better and more prosperous year ahead.

When the going gets tough, the tough goes shopping...

Revenge IS the sweetest thing. Don't get me wrong, not about to kill Hootie or harm him in any way. It's just that I have not shop till I go broke for the last one year. I do buy small items in between but having almost a blank cheque to go shopping is absolute fabulous.

Alhamdullillah, I had a small fortune last month. So, as a result, I went shopping. It all started out 2 weekends ago, with the Melium Group Clearance Sale. It continued to last Friday with FJ Benjamin Warehouse Sale and the launch of the Malaysia Mega Sale. And of course, me being me, must now spent and spent to my heart contents.

I know, I know, times are tough. I should really be savings instead of spending (or as I put it to my mum "Simpan Mak, simpan kat kedai"). But I really feel that I deserve this shopping spree. I mean, I work hard for the money, I spent only my money, I did not steal nor have I asked Hootie for his money. So, to conclude, it's my money and I shall spent it as to how I deem fit.

Hence, after 2 pairs of shoes, 1 pair of Crocs, 1 document bag, 18 pieces of working shirts, 8 pairs of pants, 3 sets of lingerie, 1 phone, 5 sets of cufflinks and other odds and ends, I'm one happy cookie with a wardrobe full of new stuffs.

Can Woman Have It All?

Man... it has been donkey years since I've actually written anything. There's a lot has been going on in life right now, juggling between work, business, Hootie, family, friends and personal indulgence.

Brief update, Hootie is still bed ridden but his movement are a lot more now. He can even belly dance in bed (just use your imagination). His right side of the body is getting stronger by the day and his left side is gaining strength.

Last Tuesday morning, I was watching the re-run of the re-run of Oprah. The topic which was talked about was "Can Woman Have It All?" It was rather interesting as different woman interprets it differently. Some believe that we can have it all and of course the others believe we can't.

To have it all, we need to sacrifice a few things (so, how is this having it all?). Talking from personal experience, I don't think we can have it all. For instance, in order to climb the corporate ladder, we need to sacrifice something, let it be family, friends or personal indulgences. Come on guys, answer me honestly, how many times do have to choose between work and spending time with friends/family? I've been in this situation one time to many.

Over the years (well, actually after my 3 years stint in the audit world), I have adopted an attitude that work is last (notice how I rate my work as the last priority in life). First priority would be myself (yes, I am a evil *&^@#), second would be Hootie, next in line would be my family and extended family, then comes my pet sis/god children, close friends, friends and last but not least work (I still need to feed myself, don't I?).

How can one have everything in life if one need to keep making sacrifices? I want a lot of things, let it be material or not but I am nowhere near having everything I want. I want to be there for Hootie 24/7 but someone have to look for money to pay for the bills. Even though I'm no longer working full time, the time when I'm out earning moolahs, I just have to close one eye and leave Hootie behind.

Some say we need to strike a balance between everything we do in life. Again, doesn't that lead back to the "making sacrifices" route? Spending more money for an Aigner bag means there's less money to spend on something else. Putting aside some money for savings means there's less money to splurge. Decisions, decisions... When will this end?

For me, not having it all is not as bad as it looks. The main thing for me is that I'm happy, hence everything else in life is secondary.

"You must have emphaty..."

"You must have emphaty..." said one of the few annoying extended family members of Hootie... Yeah right! Try taking care of a*$%^`#"!s, s?y, c^!$%*~g, sick husband and see whether you can have emphaty...

As usual, you can't run from such annoying relatives, where they have no clue what you have to go through. Can't really blame them and their existence always amazes me.

Between saving InLaws "waterface" and shocking extended family members on what a jerk Hootie is, I think saving InLaws pride takes precedent. But sometimes I just wish that these people just shut up and leave us alone.

Among the many, many family members, UncleChik is the only person who really helps out. Can't imagine how it would be if he isn't around. The rest of the relatives just visits whenever they are free. So, to me, they have no rights whatsoever to leave comments. Suggestions that does not add value is also not welcome.

Another family member is also nursing a sick person. Only the other day she poured out her heart saying how she is annoyed at people who keeps critising the way she's nursing her sick husband and how they keep giving her useless pieces of advice. She's much older than the InLaws and she's only have a maid to help her out. Her children can only help out so much as they are also busy with their lives.

It is always easier to leave running commentaries than actually contributing positively towards a situation. I sometimes fall prey to such sin. But now that I am having to go through with it, I do realise that things are always more than skin deep. There's a reason why God charter our lives as such. Take JabbatheHut for instance. He is filthy rich but he has no one to take real care of him. He's single, his sister is too busy taking care her two very young children and his mother is always away and not getting any younger. He spends thousands on medication each month due to having lots of health problems. So, just imagine if he falls sick and is bed ridden. For this reason, that's why God gave him tons of money so that he can pay for 24-hour nurses in order to take care of him.

I guess, Mr. Pink is right... If you don't have anything nice to say, you should just keep quite. You never know whose feelings you might be hurting.

Happy Eid ul-Fitr

Raya is just around the corner and madame is definitely in Raya mood already (well, actually more of a holiday mood and knowing that I'll be free as a bird after Raya). To all my friends, Happy Eid ul-Fitr.

Somehow I can't help reflecting how Raya this year will be. Of course, I'm bersyukur to no ends that Hootie is around to celebrate Raya, regardless of his state. But somehow Raya is not the same when you have a sick person to look after.

Saying that, I had my first taste of Raya with in-laws last year. And all I can say is that the culture is definitely different compared to mine.

I've been brought up in a family where Raya is the time where close family members get together and have a jolly good time. On Raya eve, everyone will get together at Tok Mat's family retreat and start preparing for Raya. My mother is a true believer in preparing things herself, so all the food are home made and all the baju kurungs are hand sewn by her. Raya morning is like a war zone. Straight after Subuh prayers, everyone must be up (or face the death penalty) and get ready for Raya prayers and visit to the GrandParents grave. After prayers, there will be a big raya do, where all of the Tok Mat clan will sit together, enjoy good food, ask for forgiveness, exchange Duit Raya and followed by family photos of respective families. We normally end this tradition with now leaving in a convoy to visit extended family members (ie the second cousins, third cousins and everyone else in life who are related to us).

Coming back to Hootie's family, my first Raya with them didn't leave me with a pretty picture. I had the shock of my life when I arrived at the InLaws and everyone is still sleeping. Yes, I was early (I was there at 7.30 am) but it's raya morning and to them it's as if it was just another holiday. Instead of the Raya morning rush that I normally had to go through, it was a rather quiet Raya morning, where it was just Dad, Hootie and myself going for sembahyang raya. And the real shocker was when I arrived home from Raya prayers and finding them still sleeping. I couldn't handle it anymore so I just told Hootie that I want to go see my family instead.

I guess, what I'm trying to get at is that every family have their own values. I know a few families that take holiday trips during Raya, leaving extended families behind and enjoying themselves elsewhere.

I find this sad because Raya is the only time that family members get together and catch up. I always get rather slushy around this time of the year. I fail to understand what sort of values are they teaching their young ones when they decided to go on holiday instead of visiting relatives. I know a few people who doesn't really know who are their cousins or how their cousins look like. No matter how modern one is, certain family traditions and values should be kept. I mean, there's 365 days in a year, can't you spare even 1 day visiting extended family members?

At the end of the day, I guess it is up to each individual on how they see Raya. To me, it's a time where I just want to be with my family members and surround myself with familiar faces, good food and great entertainment. I can take a trip to Bali at anytime of the year but family gatherings are always priceless.